Racist DHS Agent Sent To Train Guatemalan Border Patrol: “It’s Not Going Well”

GUATEMALA CITY, GUATEMALA — “First of all, how was I supposed to know these particular Guatemalans worked for their border patrol, and weren’t regular illegal Guatemalans that needed to be immediately apprehended?”

This was George Hader, a racist agent for the Department of Homeland Security. “No, I understand now, in hindsight, we are in Guatemala, so none of them are technically illegal, yet, but whatever.”

On Monday, the Biden Administration announced it would be training Guatemalan border patrol agents to help combat illegal immigration headed towards the US-Mexico border. The decision to send DHS agents to do the training has left many skeptical of the success of the operation, as the Department of Homeland Security and the CPB are inherently racist organizations, and the Guatemalan Border Patrol consists almost entirely of Guatemalans.

“It’s not going well,” admits Hader. He turns to a Guatemalan border patrol agent, Mateo Rodriguez, comforting a crying Guatemalan toddler. “Hey, put the kid back in the cage. I’m trying to be patient.” Hader scolds the agent. “This is my kid,” responds Rodriguez.

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